14 responses

  1. Robert Barron
    November 14, 2016

    I had just arrived home in Red Deer, Alberta, from Toronto where I lived at the time.

    Airlines and flight attendants have long been an obsession of mine so of course I was glued to the TV for news of #103.

    I remember being curled up on the couch and crying, thinking how sad it was that none of those on 103 would be home for Christmas, but I was.

    In 2014 I finally became a Flight Attendant myself. One of the principles I always remember is that someday I may be called on to show the courage and clear head that too many crew are called to show under the most difficult of circumstances. I think of them and I aim always to do them proud.

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  2. Dene’ Ballantine
    November 17, 2015

    I had made dinner and was waiting for the friends I spent so much time with while based in London: Noelle Berti-Campbell, from Paris (France). She never boasted that she was one of the ‘Miss France’ winners in years past but we all knew. We lived and played together, supported each other in good times and bad, from boyfriend breakups and business ventures to moves from one country to another and she was in my wedding party. Every terrorist attack reminds me of her and my other five friends, all killed while working on the same ill-fated Pan Am flight 103. My survivor guilt reminds me I would have been on that flight because we all bid on trips together- but I moved to New York and was expecting these same friends for a holiday dinner but of course, they never showed up: Siv Engstrom, funny and VERY Scandinavian; Babette Avoyne (who helped me design my wedding dress and was the funniest woman I have ever met); Elke Kuhne, who sold me her almost full-length fur coat to keep me warm during the cold French winters (and I still have it!); Nieves Larracoachea with her fabulous sense of life and humor (almost as funny as Babette!); and Paul Garrett, a sweet and charming man, great at parties. I miss them and the wonderful times we had together very much. I think of them every time a terrorist attack happens.

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  3. Marianne Nisco Edward
    January 21, 2015

    Siv Ulla Engstrom-a very dear friend of mine.
    Thank you for this wonderful tribute to our friends, never forgotten!

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  4. Jody Logan
    January 21, 2015

    I was on leave…had just given birth to twins. I remember watching a soap opera, “The Guiding Light”, when the news flash came on missing Pan Am flight. Having formerly been London based my gut reaction was right….went to phone to call one of my best Pan Am friends who was still London based, John Dean. He was not on flight 103. Still, so many years later, hard to comprehend.

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  5. vincenzina schifano
    December 23, 2014

    Walked into the crew lounge at JFK. I was to work the next flight to London…..everyone was so somber. I saw Jim, he said ” you haven’t heard ”
    “Heard what?”
    ” 103 crashed over Lockerbie ”
    ” Oh my God “……..my heart sank, my blood ran cold.

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  6. Marc Eisman
    December 22, 2014

    We were working our newly launched LAX IAD service about two hours out of IAD. The capt called me into the flight deck and told me the 103 went down over Scotland?
    He asked that we we extra vigilant as it was suspected to be terrorism. The crew was in shock. When we arrived at the Shoram we all sat in one room and were glued to the TV.

    My next trip was to LHR two days later. We arrived x mas day .
    We were put at a different hotel and the briefing office was like a morgue. Half of my returning crew did not operate the flight home but remained for counseling.
    That was the beginning of the end for many things……Pan Am and flying has never been the same .
    Most important w lost friends family and freedom.

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  7. Margaret Key Taaffe
    December 22, 2014

    I arrived at JFK the afternoon of the crash after commuting up from Atlanta. As I entered the Worldport, I saw people crying, hugging and my first thought was that PanAm had ceased operations (after being Financially Ailing PanAm for years). When I got down to briefing , I heard about Lockerbie. We flew to Rome that night, behaving professionally, not discussing our problems with passengers but with a very cold feeling inside. Pan Am’s worldwide fame had led terrorists to attack PanAm instead of a more viable American carrier. The end of a wonderful Airline.

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  8. Mariolina Stevenson
    December 21, 2014

    On that day I was flying from Mexico to JFK. I was surprised that the captain was not the one who was supposed to be on the flight. He had swapped with the captain of the London-JFK!! When I got to the custom area, after landing, a saw a lot of people crying. A ground agent approached me and said: “Say a prayer one of our planes went down”. I started to cry too.

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  9. Diane Princer-Lezama
    December 21, 2014

    I was at home in NYC when the news came over the TV. I went back the office to see if I could help in anyway. From the minute I walked into the Reservation office in the Pan Am Building I barely left for the next week or so…there was so much to do, so many questions to answer from people calling in. Much of it is still a blur, we were working under such horrible conditions. Today many memories still come flooding back especially when I see one of our planes on TV… I went to the memorial in the UK and seeing Lockerbie made the horror real not just a picture on the TV.

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  10. John A. Bibas RKL
    December 21, 2014

    I worked on telecom issues at JFK that day. I didn’t hear the news until I got home to NJ. The next day I was sent to the Pan Am Building to work the Command Center and stayed for several weeks.

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  11. Brenda-Anne Dymock
    December 21, 2014

    Thank you all for sharing your memories. I was Los Angeles based and one of the reps who were in London and Lockerbie, along with Danny Valdez and Steve Priskie. No question these were the most difficult, emotional days,ever. Today, our Airplane floral wreath lies in the Memorial Garden in Scotland ,as it has for each of the 26 yrs. Tears still flowing with the memories

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  12. Tony Vincent
    December 21, 2014

    On a crew bus from NYC Doral in enroute to JFK. I had headphones on listening to local radio when the news of a plane crash was broadcast. The name of the carrier was unofficially broadcast. All I remember saying is “we lost one”. This was the moment in history when Pan Am would begin its unrecoverable decline.

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  13. MYRON ROSIE ROSENSTEIN
    December 20, 2014

    WAS IN LONDON ON VACATION, PAN AM OPS JFK CONTACTED ME, TO HEAD TO LOCKERBIE AM OF DEC 22 1988, FROM LONDON TO GLASGOW ON TO LOCKERBIE. I REMAINED THERE SEVERAL WEEKS, ASSISTING TRAVELING LOCKERBIE LONDON EACH DAY AS A COURIER FOR THE PAN AM DIR IN LOCKERBIE COMMAND CENTER. MY WIFE ANNE FARMER ROSENSTEIN WAS ALSO THERE THE FIRST WEEK. ANNE WAS PASSENGER SERVICE AT HEATHROW.

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  14. Mary Beberman Heine
    December 20, 2014

    I did not know any of the crewmembers, but I was new to flying, just passing my 6 month probation on December 10th, 1988. I had just replaced my silver wings with my new gold wings at my JFK base. I had returned from my Vienna trip on Sunday, December 18th. I wouldn’t fly my next Vienna trip until December 23rd, 2 days after the the Pan Am 103 exploded.

    I had not known that Pan Am 103 had been deliberately brought down, and was out that day running errands, and appointments. This was before the Internet, so unless you were by the TV, you didn’t know the news. I returned home to find 7 messages on my answering machine. They were all from my siblings and mom, asking me “are you okay”? I could hear the terror, tears, and worry in their voices, so I called my Mom back immediately. She cried out, “Oh my God, thank goodness you weren’t on that flight”. I said, “What flight? What happened”? She said, “Turn on CNN”.

    And then I saw that iconic picture of the 747 laying on its side in that field. I went numb as I listened to what had happened. I was in shock, and couldn’t understand why this had happened. What made it even more dreadful was hearing that it had gone down in Scotland. My older sister lives in Scotland, before I heard the town of Lockerbie, I was worried that perhaps it could have been my sister’s house. But she lives in Edinburgh.

    I got a phone call from Pan Am at 2:30 a.m. that night, telling me that my sister was okay, that she wasn’t working on the flight. I was confused, until I realized Pan Am was referring to me. My other siblings had probably placed a very frantic call to Pan Am earlier when they weren’t able to reach me.

    I was just heartsick, and sat shell-shocked to the TV, hearing speculations about what could have happened. I saw those Duty Free brochures laying on the ground, and was imaging where in the service they might have been. Christmas was a few days away, but I didn’t even care about the holidays anymore, knowing there were thousands of people crying and grieving for their loved ones. The one TV image I will never forget was that they showed a woman at the airport fainting and wailing when she received the news of her college-aged child dying. I wished I had never seen that, because it hit me hard, knowing her life was forever changed.

    I drove up to JFK on Friday, December 23rd, for my report at 4:10 pm. I gave myself 4 hours to get there, usually it was a 2 hour and 15 minute drive. I had not figured in the holiday traffic, and was in terrible bumper to bumper traffic. Again, this was before cell phones, so I would pull off to a rest stop to call Scheduling, to tell them I would be late. I did that twice, not arriving to the airplane until after all the passengers had boarded. By this time I was in tears with Scheduling, apologizing profusely for making such a mistake in gauging travel time. They were very nice to me, telling me it would be okay, not to cry, but to drive safely. Apparently I had heard that over 100 flight attendants had quit their jobs, saying they just couldn’t go back to flying, so I’m sure Scheduling was busy, trying to man all these holiday flights.

    When I got to JFK, there was no Christmas music playing, and the terminal was quite somber. Even when I boarded the flight, everything was very quiet, and the passengers were quiet in their seats. We all knew that flying would never be the same. I have never been able to rest on my crew breaks since Pan Am 103, as I keep anticipating an explosion and immediate decompression. This will never leave me.

    I’ve heard about the flight attendants who had died on the flight from other crewmembers. I mourn for their lives. I am so glad we have this site to talk about them, and how it has affected all of us.

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